The weight of being a man is one that cannot be taken lightly. Ever since the dawn of time we have been taught by our fathers and grandfathers the timeless traditions of handling manhood and the respect that it demands. We start at a young age with camping, hunting and fishing. Traditions that should be known by every potential man. A few years pass and all of a sudden you start learning how to build epic things. Things such as the Great Pyramids, The Great Wall of China, the Hoover Dam and of course the 8th wonder of the world a 426 Hemi. These are natural steps to becoming a man that shape generations and mold civilizations. You will eventually have to learn to kill an attacking bear with your bare hands, and build yourself a shelter. You learn how to start a fire with a piece of wood in order to keep a woman or a child warm. This is also beneficial if you do decide to cook your food. These are timeless traditions that have been the foundation of our kind since the dawn of time. There have been a few setbacks or speed bumps along the way. There was once a time about 100 years ago when boys wore dresses. Today you may notice a trend of things called “skinny jeans” and “hybrid cars”. I’m not sure what a “hybrid” is in regards to the automotive world but maybe that’s because a “hybrid” is better known as a Happy Meal toy. Regardless of the setbacks, real men constantly strive for more and make it apparent to lesser beings. You may wonder how to spot these real men that wander with purpose among minions. Well it can be difficult to spot one due to modern job requirements and women and children depending on them for shelter and hand caught fish. It’s not like you can comfortably ask for someones man resume but there is one characteristic that distinguishes the experienced man from those who you might question the ability to change a damn tire. That simple yet distinguished characteristic is the BEARD. A man’s beard is a passport to manhood and an iconic feature that demands respect and power. A beard is a symbol of someone who can slay a dragon, make a shield with its scales and a club with its bones, rescue a beautiful princess while simultaneously building a cabin to protect her and the many children she will soon bare to carry on those epic man genes. A beard says to the world, “I’m a force to be reckoned with and I’ve more than likely killed my own food on more than one occasion and could rebuild a 1964 GTO with my eyes closed”. Having a beard is nothing to take lightly as is the responsibility of being a man. It is a symbol of pride, confidence and power. Many men will never know the benefit of having a beard but can we really call them men? Having a beard comes with an unlimited supply of benefits and none of them should be taken for granted.
Here are 21 images that prove beards change everything when it comes to being a man.
1. Just look at this guy. Would you question his manliness? If you aren’t sure, jump into your hybrid and leave now….
2. I dare you to tell Sean Connery he is anything less than a man. I’ve heard rumors that his house is carpeted with pelts of vicious animals that tried to face him.
3. Without that beard you’d be looking at a ginger with a big orange mallet. With a beard you’re looking at a badass with a goal you’d be a fool to interrupt.
4. History has proven that having a beard is something that should not be taken lightly. A bearded man has always been and will always be a symbol of power and respect.
5. There is a word that defines a beard that you may have been using in the wrong context your whole life.” Gravitas was one of the Roman virtues. It may be translated variously as weight, seriousness and dignity, also importance, and connotes a certain substance or depth of personality.”
6. For a career that actually matters, you need a badass beard on the resume, simple as that. The stats don’t lie.
7. Beards make men more attractive. It’s science and therefore cannot be argued with.
8. A decent beard can turn even the most pasty wimp into a rugged badass.
9. A baby-faced nerd into a powerful revolutionary whose not to be messed with.
10. A random guy with horrible taste in ties into the director of one of the most lucrative film franchises in the known universe.
11. A tie-wearing nobody into a legendary operatic powerhouse.
12. A weird looking actor who is way past his prime…
13. Into an Oscar winner who married Jennifer Garner.
14. A beard gives you something to stroke while your pondering life’s great mysteries.
15. Growing a man beard saves you time. 145 days in fact!!! That’s 145 days that you can use to build a cabin, a boat and a longbow to hunt with. Which should leave you with 140 days to hunt, eat and relax.
16. A beard allows you to accent your point to the fullest.
17. A badass beard will intimidate even the most worthy adversaries and allow you to conquer your opponents.
18. A real beard enchants and attracts women like nothing else.
19. Not all beards are created equal. Here is a graph that rightfully groups certain beards and the levels you must achieve for your due respect.
20. There are rules for the bearded and they are written in stone. I’m not sure where these stones are but that’s neither here nor there.
21. The benefits of having a beard are simply endless. These benefits will also be reaped by the bearded mans partner.
Beards are reserved for the manliest of men. If you can’t grow a beard, just know that you will receive a ton of shit for your terrible genes.
This cartoon sums it up perfectly even though I applaud your efforts in trying to prove your manhood.
In other words, beards are Fu*#^ng awesome and they prove to anyone that you are a damn man and proud of it.
Beard on friends and aside from these 21 benefits of having a beard just know that you are a better man for having one.
Needless to say, it is quite obvious why the bearded man is better than a non-bearded man. You might disagree but I would gamble that you either can’t grow a beard or you live in communist China. Beard the hell up friends and wear your manhood proudly. Beards are not a thing of the past but a movement into the future of manhood. Lets bring back the days when men were supposed to be men. The days when you fixed something if it broke, not hire someone with a beard to come solve your little problems. A beard will shield you from the haters and open your door to hoards of gorgeous women. A beard will make you a leader among men and your opponents will fear you. You will be proud, you will be courageous, you will be all that is man!
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